I was scrolling through the Jezebel website (Haven't heard of it? Well, it's a kinda sorta feminist site) a couple days ago and came across this article...
…Which is one of many written about a love lab study conducted years ago. (Why do I not have the job of a Love Psychologist? I need to figure out why I am not that, pronto.) This study, which was recreated recently by an academic/author, seems to support the idea that by scripting questions and manipulating the conversation between two people you can speed up the intimacy of verbal exchange and thus make two people start to feel love for each other. (Ummmm, that is definitely not a scientific conclusion - that was my verbal blahhh from the article.) So, by the end of the 36 questions, you're closer and more comfortable with the other person because you have made yourself vulnerable and in a way that you probably never would have done left to your own devices.
Interesting, right? I encourage you to not only read the article but also the 36 questions and ask yourself how they make you feel.
To conclude, too things have really stuck with me since the article. Two things that I had never really considered. The first is a concept that is in the last bit of the article:
... love not as something that happens to us, but as an action we take, a choice we make.
Whhhhat?! We don't fall in love?! We actually have self control?! We choose our partners?! Yeah, I guess that makes sense but that sure doesn't go along with the hollywood love stigma. Just like we choose our partner, we choose to love them.
Second thing - Is this study showing only that we can speed up love or that we can essentially fall in love with anyone? Whoa. Ever considered girls? Boys? Why not?
Ok, this is blowing my mind. Just read the article.
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